Trying to figure it out


I went online today and applied for a few jobs.  But all I want to do is work through my writing.  Anytime I look openings, I get this feeling in the pit of my stomach that tells me there’s nothing for me in those listings.  My gut is telling me all kinds of shit right now.  But the problem is, there is no way to know if what I’m feeling is real or just nerves or nausea.  I mean, really, who wants to work?

My writing ability is enough to get me paid regularly, perhaps well.  I have plenty to say.  The universe is filled with much more to write on.  So that’s what I need to do: write on.

But don’t worry, I have more figured out than I let on.  It’s all just a matter of time.  Every day, as I learn or experience something new, the light gets brighter.  Truth is, it’s blinding.

Anyway, I’m gonna go and get to doing my thing.  It’s been real.  You win some, you lose some.  Don’t hate the player, hate the game.  This too shall pass.  It is what it is.  Live and Learn.

I need to come up with one of those sayings myself.  Otherwise, I might as well just say “Fuck it” and leave it at that.  Maybe that’ll pay off for me.

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One thought on “Trying to figure it out

  1. There is a reason your heart tells you things, fight or flight! I have learned the best way to get in a better place is start doing what is right even if its harder. In the end it will be a lot easier and you will be happier. Get a good foundation first and then you can be more choosey. AND most of all don’t take anyones bull shit, you deserve more then that! 🙂

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